Ok, please mark this under I-Bet-It-Hurts-More-Than-Getting-My-Balls-Kicked, some 39 year-old Thai woman named Kanchana Kaetkaew, who is also known as the “Scorpion Queen“, has set a Guinness World record by putting a scorpion in her mouth for over two minutes. Her royal Scorpionida-highness carried out this weird feat in Pattaya and was assisted by her husband, Bunathawee Siengwong. Interestingly, her hubby is known as the “Centipede King“. The two were married in a haunted house on 2006. Hmm, wanna take a guess at what food items they served their guests at their wedding reception? I bet this was the liquor of the evening.

As if having a fatal thing in her mouth is not enough (I’m not talking about her husband’s “centipede”), this bitch plans to break another record by staying in a glass compound with 5,000 live scorpions for 33 days. I urge her to take a bigger challenge by confining herself in a tiny space with Bai Ling and Bobby Trendy. I’d be surprised if she can last for a day. Note to my newest girlfriend here, don’t forget to bring some of your tiny little friends with you and never hesitate to use them as a weapon of destruction on these two crazy bitches!